Thranduil's Eyebrows
by Neril
Summary: A short adventure about Thranduil and his eyebrows, read to find out what happens! Has little Legolas!


Thranduil fabulously tossed his long hair behind him, as he took one last glance at himself in the mirror. Ah, such fabulousness. He walked briskly from the room, his long red robes flowing behind him.

"ADA!"

Thranduil turned and raised a fabulously eyebrow, then let out an un-earthly screech. He quickly glanced around to make sure no one had heard it, then down at his blond-haired son, who was holding a spider in his hands.

"Drop it," Thranduil commanded his son.

"But Ada…" Legolas blinked his big blue eyes up at him.

Thranduil knocked the spider out of his hands, then stomped on it. Fifty times.

Little Legolas burst into tears. "ADA! You killed my friend!" Then he turned and ran off.

Thranduil sighed, now he had to make him happy again; he hated it when Legolas was crying. He looked around and grabbed the nearest thing to him, which happened to be a bottle of hair spray.

"Legolas, I have something for you!"

Legolas came a stop, and ran back to Thranduil. "Yes, Ada?"

"Here." He handed him the bottle. "Do your hair. It looks horrible."

"Yes, Ada," Legolas said cheerfully, taking the hair spray. Thranduil then fabulously walked off to his throne, he had some, uh... stuff to do.

-.-

"Ada!"

"Yes?" Thranduil was practicing his sword fighting skills (He had to do it sometime), in the throne room, when Legolas came running up. He had an assortment of things in his hands.

"Yes, very nice," Thranduil said, at least he wasn't playing with spiders now.

"Watch this," Legolas said cheerfully. He lit a match, then grabbed a handful of black powder and tossed it in the air, throwing the tiny flaming stick at it. It blew up.

Thranduil just stood there, VERY STILL. He took in a deep breath, and looked down where Legolas was hacking at a spider with a letter opener (also known as a hobbit-sized sword). A strange feeling came over Thranduil, and he reached up to his face and-

"WHERE ARE MY EYEBROWS?!"

Legolas eyes widened, and he threw everything in his hands behind him, and ran off. He didn't like it when his Ada was angry.

"MY FOOT!" Thranduil howled, as he started hopping up and down on one leg. Legolas ran faster.

"King Thran –"

Thranduil jumped, and quickly regained his fabulous kingly manner. "What?!"

"Are you all right? I heard screaming."

"I'm _fine._ "

"Uh... Lo-"

"What?"

"Your eyebrows."

"Yes! I know. Go find me new ones!"

"But…they grow on, you don't glue them on."

"That means I need fake ones!"

"Yes, of course." The elf raced off, he also didn't like an angry Thranduil. Thranduil started to take note of this, maybe he needed to visit his anger management specialist. Whoever that was. Or was he the one he fired last week? He shrugged, eh, whatever, he would just get a new one.

-.-

"AARGH!" Thranduil growled in frustration as he tried to straighten the fake eyebrows, then ripped them off. He tossed them aside, then shoved all three hundred thirty-three pair onto the floor. He spotted a marker, and grabbed it. Then started scribbling on his forehead. He looked at himself in the mirror when he finished. It looked worse than before.

"AAAHHHHH!" He grabbed at his hair, then stopped himself. He would not. He would not pull out his beautiful hair. He would not pull out his hair. Deep, deep breath. He could just scrub the marker off. Yes, he nodded, re-assuring himself. He tossed the marker aside, and went to find something to clean his face.

Finally he found a rag, and got it wet with warm water. He went back to the mirror, and started scrubbing. He did this for ten minutes, when he finally realized something was wrong. The marker _was_ not coming off. The only thing he managed to do was make his face red.

"AAHHH! You vile thingy stuff! Come off!"

He happen to look over at the marker, and grabbed it. "WHY IS THIS A PERMANENT MARKER?! WHY DID SOMEONE PUT THIS IN MY – oh, I did. Never mind that." He tossed the marker behind him and stormed out to find a way to rid his face of the black stuff. Why had he chosen black? Maybe if he dyed his hair black no-one would notice.

-.-

"We've been infiltrated!" A random elf screamed running down the hall. By the time he got to the end, he was out of breath. (Very unusual for elves, but I think he had too much of something, or it could have been the hall. Once some humans visited and called the hall, the Hall of Insanity. They never made it home though, they went insane. So no one, except Thranduil knows of this name. Maybe a couple more, not to any mention names.) Anyway back to the story. The elf forgot why he was screaming that, and went back to where he was that morning when he first saw it half-way down the hall (It's a really long hall.)

He finally reached the place, (it was dark by then). And lo and behold, there it was. A demon! Sitting on the throne! Black hair, tangled and sticking in all directions, its face was red, with black markings. And it had no eyebrows. Strange.

A group of elf warriors came running up. "What's wrong? We heard shouting!"

The elf pointed toward the throne. "L-look!" he gasped out. "We have been made!"

"Warriors!" The leader of the group yelled to his fellow fighters.

"We're right beside you," one said.

"Capture this infiltrator and take him to the King!"

The elves charged forward, very awesomely and uh... awesome. They ran up the stairway, only meant for one, they were very pushy and ended up shoving each other off in a very un-elfy like manner.

"We got him!" One yelled, when some of them reached the top. The others were moaning and groaning while rolling on the floor, with broken bones and cuts and bruises.

"Let me go! YOU – YOU ELVES!"

"King Thranduil!" one of the elves exclaimed, letting go of him.

"Of course it's me! What did you think I was?! A ORC?!"

"Well, actually, yes."

Thranduil didn't say anything, he just stared at him for a minute, then stomped down off his throne. The elves followed him, apologizing and muttering stuff to him. Which made him angry, because he couldn't understand them.

"Speak clearly or shut your mouth!" he roared.

The elves came to a stop, and looked at him in surprise. One of them turned and ran off to get him some wine, which might help with his temper. Thranduil stomped to his room; when he got there, he swung around to look at himself in the mirror.

"AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

An elf warrior came running, crashing through the door and came to a stop. "What is it?!"

"There!" Thranduil pointed to the thing in the mirror. "Right there! Don't you see it?! Tell me you see it! I have to – oh, never mind. That's me. You can go now."

As soon as the elf left, Thranduil threw himself across his bed. Just as a knock came to the door that was hanging off its last hinge (from when the elf had charged in).

"Come in," Thranduil said, his voice muffled by the pillow.

"I brought you some wine," the elf said.

Thranduil pushed himself up and took it, "Thank you." He gulped it down, when he finished he noticed the elf had left. The door crashed to the floor.

Thranduil started to fell woozy, had someone drugged his drink. When he found out who did this he would…

-.-

Little Legolas walked into his Ada's room, and saw him sound asleep on the floor. He noticed the black markings on his face, he thought he was an orc at first. Then noticed the markings were made with a marker. Markers! His eyes lit up, and he ran over to a desk with pens, markers, and a bunch of other junk.

He grabbed a handful of colored markers, and ran over and plopped down on the floor by Thranduil. He popped the lid off a pink one, and started coloring on the best surface available. He would make a rainbow, then Ada would look happy. Right?

-.-

Wrong.

-.-

"WHAT HAPPENED TO MY FACE?!"

"I found it!"

"Found what?!" Thranduil whirled around to face the speaker.

The elf held up a bottle. "It removes marker."

" _Good_."

After two hours of working, Thranduil managed to get all the marker off. He was pleased, and started to get in a cheerful mood. And then he noticed his eyebrows – or rather, the absence of them. He then wondered why he couldn't find anybody for three days.

-.-

Three days later, Legolas appeared. Thranduil had been feeling sad, because, well, no one had been around for three days.

"Looky," Legolas said. "There's hair on your face."

"WHAT?!" Thranduil leaped out of bed, and raced toward the mirror. There was no way he would grow hair on his face like one of those dwarves. Even the thought of them made him shudder. As he saw his reflection, he let out a sigh. No hair. Except…

"MY EYEBROWS! We must throw a celebration! My eyebrows are returning!" He ran out into the hall and started yelling about having a party.

Elves magically started appearing, chattering about the party.

"Wow! I didn't know I had so many subjects!" Thranduil grinned, and ran off to the wine cellar. "It's party time!" he shouted down to the elves.

"Yay," came a weak reply.

"Get out the disco ball!" Thranduil shouted, running down the halls. "And the chips; Galion, order some pizza! Oh, and I want hot fudge sundaes!" He stopped next to a random elf.

"What would _you_ like to add to the party?"

"Cheetos."

"Cheetos it is! Oh, and get some of those Doritos, they have some code thingy going on for the Avengers movie coming out!"

And so, the kingdom went back to sort of normal and happiness. Until Legolas discovered Kool-aid.

 **Please review :)  
**


End file.
